Babawilly in Lagos 1
11.2.08. 09:45.
11.2.08. 09:45.
Take off! Bound for Lagos via Amsterdam on KLM Royal Dutch Airlines Flight 1422.
13:15 hrs we leave Schipol Airport on a different plane. I prayed that my luggage was still with me. Last time I flew KLM the crew sprayed the cabin with a toxic spray (?Insecticide). I almost choked. Thank God, there was no repeat of that torture by aerosol spray this time around. Had 3 seats to myself, i spread out like I was in first class. One babe was just looking at me. Small time she stand, ‘can you watch my bag while I go to the loo’ she talk. I nodded. Sebi I be 40,000 feet maiguard abi? She think say armed robbers dey here?
Went through in-flight entertainment and found World music. Femi Kuti dey there dey represent we. Imagine that. Beng beng beng! Which kain Viagra music be that sef.
Small time Dutch pilot dey tell us weather and temperature in Lagos. Persin gat to tell this people say na only one thing we wan know. Light dey abi e no dey!
The air hostess even get liver to tell us say – in the event of an emergency landing on water , you will find life jackets under your seats…God forbid! Na you and who wan go follow mammy water play for ocean. I almost abuse the hostess sef.
Them bring drink. ‘Coke please’ I talk. Na holy communion dem give guys. She just turn tiny coke into plastic cup. E no even full. Dis woman no know say na two cans I dey drink?
Them bring rice, I chop. No Dodo. No moin moin. Abi make I begin sing for dem..oni dodo oni moin moin…
Small time we land Lagos. Best flight I have had to date.
But why should I pay 100 Naira to use the trolley in Muritala Mohammed airport when e free for Birmingham and Amsterdam? Na one sisi even dash mi the 100 Naira as na only pounds I get. (Executive begging!)
Soon we land for Okota na im one useless mosquito hail, ‘New blood don come o!’
‘Your papa!’ na im I take reply am.
11-2-08
Off to Victoria Island to see friends. Everything going so well, cannot even remember what happened. Few things I can remember are going to banks, going to Frenchies, ringing and texting many (Glo chop my money o), eating and drinking.
15-2-08
Attended Valentine Ball organised by House on the Rock Church at the Muson Centre. Got there about 7.30pm. Omo, come see Red everywhere like Red sea. Remain small the Red carpet for divide make I waka pass.
Nice evening it was.
MC for night included Wild Child and one comedian so. Good performances all round. West African Idol winner, Timi sang.
Pat Utomi spoke about his charity work with widows which was quite inspiring.
Dem bring jollof, I chop.
Then we danced. Mai people, na so the dance carry me o. Everybody hail. Pastor Paul Adefarasin come carry blender give me as the Olorogun of dancing. E no easy.
One guy propose to im babe (in public ke!). The guy get liver o! She said yes, so risk paid off.
My friend Enate wey carry me go come release poem to im waif of 12 years. From nowhere cake appear. Im come recite poem. When e finish, me sef nak another poem. Was very touching.
We got home 12.30am but excitement no gree us sleep. Na so so gist.
13:15 hrs we leave Schipol Airport on a different plane. I prayed that my luggage was still with me. Last time I flew KLM the crew sprayed the cabin with a toxic spray (?Insecticide). I almost choked. Thank God, there was no repeat of that torture by aerosol spray this time around. Had 3 seats to myself, i spread out like I was in first class. One babe was just looking at me. Small time she stand, ‘can you watch my bag while I go to the loo’ she talk. I nodded. Sebi I be 40,000 feet maiguard abi? She think say armed robbers dey here?
Went through in-flight entertainment and found World music. Femi Kuti dey there dey represent we. Imagine that. Beng beng beng! Which kain Viagra music be that sef.
Small time Dutch pilot dey tell us weather and temperature in Lagos. Persin gat to tell this people say na only one thing we wan know. Light dey abi e no dey!
The air hostess even get liver to tell us say – in the event of an emergency landing on water , you will find life jackets under your seats…God forbid! Na you and who wan go follow mammy water play for ocean. I almost abuse the hostess sef.
Them bring drink. ‘Coke please’ I talk. Na holy communion dem give guys. She just turn tiny coke into plastic cup. E no even full. Dis woman no know say na two cans I dey drink?
Them bring rice, I chop. No Dodo. No moin moin. Abi make I begin sing for dem..oni dodo oni moin moin…
Small time we land Lagos. Best flight I have had to date.
But why should I pay 100 Naira to use the trolley in Muritala Mohammed airport when e free for Birmingham and Amsterdam? Na one sisi even dash mi the 100 Naira as na only pounds I get. (Executive begging!)
Soon we land for Okota na im one useless mosquito hail, ‘New blood don come o!’
‘Your papa!’ na im I take reply am.
11-2-08
Off to Victoria Island to see friends. Everything going so well, cannot even remember what happened. Few things I can remember are going to banks, going to Frenchies, ringing and texting many (Glo chop my money o), eating and drinking.
15-2-08
Attended Valentine Ball organised by House on the Rock Church at the Muson Centre. Got there about 7.30pm. Omo, come see Red everywhere like Red sea. Remain small the Red carpet for divide make I waka pass.
Nice evening it was.
MC for night included Wild Child and one comedian so. Good performances all round. West African Idol winner, Timi sang.
Pat Utomi spoke about his charity work with widows which was quite inspiring.
Dem bring jollof, I chop.
Then we danced. Mai people, na so the dance carry me o. Everybody hail. Pastor Paul Adefarasin come carry blender give me as the Olorogun of dancing. E no easy.
One guy propose to im babe (in public ke!). The guy get liver o! She said yes, so risk paid off.
My friend Enate wey carry me go come release poem to im waif of 12 years. From nowhere cake appear. Im come recite poem. When e finish, me sef nak another poem. Was very touching.
We got home 12.30am but excitement no gree us sleep. Na so so gist.
4 comments:
Hilarious post as usual. Where do I start? Light dey abi e no dey? Oni dodo, watch my bag.... LOL!!
Thanks my sister
Thanks my sister
Thanks my sister
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