Dear Mai Sister 4
Dear My Sister,
Panic not. Ah-ah. Can’t you take a joke? Just because I mentioned poison you then carry go mention to Mama. Now di woman dey mai haus. She arrive from Las Gidi yesterday. Now I no fit dey go on dates laik before. Mama say na 1 year Visa dem give am. My sister, Mama go come play with you smol o for Texas bicos mi, I no send o.Mai relationship dey sensitive stage and mi I need quality time with my love.
Na you and yua big mouth cause dis panic. Now mama say na mi muss to buy her ticket as na mi frighten di family into sending her down to look her son. Na you go pay mai sister. Na you cause panic. Anyway make we no argue.
Dem don sack mi from Sunday teacher work o. Na mai fault sha. Na Memory verse scandal some people dey call am. You see, Pastor talk make everybody learn James 1:13. You sabi am now..When tempted, no-one should say, God is tempting me for God cannot be tempted with evil…
Mai sister , when I dey type Sunday school programme on Saturday night , dey listen to Barry White, I no know the time I type Songs of Solomon 1:13. Dat one e strong well well.
..My lover is to me a sachet of myrrh resting between my breasts.
My sister, for the first time in the history of the children’s church, everyone learnt memory verse o. Even one 2 year old, im brothers teach am.
Dem summon mi before elders. My sister, I come dey laff. I hear the allegations but na mai Lepa face I dey see. Dem say na toilet I go dey clean. I come make mistake ask ‘Male or female toilet?’. Mi I ask for information but dem look mi with eye bad like say I get bad thing for mind. (No bi Idris Mohammed sing dat song…Oh Lord, Please don’t let me be misunderstood?) I know say for dia mind na ‘get thee behind me satan’ dem dey think. Dem demote mi to car park. Na there I dey 2 weeks till dem come sack mi pata pata. You see, I been dey direct traffic but I reserve space next to mai Infiniti jeep for my Lepa. Pastor wife come arrive late ask if space dey. I say no (Technically I was not lying as the only space next to my Infinity Jeep was reserved for my Lepacious darling). Na dat day Pastor wife carry plenty books come church, but I no know. She go pack 5 streets away. As she dey struggle to waka come with her plenty load and children she see me dey direct Lepa into the parking space with a smile on mai face.
My sister, as I dey type so, I no get role for church again o. Pastor say I must appear im haus for counselling. Even mama no happy with mi. I juss dey laff dem. Love don anaesthetise mai brain. All di parents for church dey look mi bad eye say I teach dia pickin wrong memory verse. Na wetin sef. Na mi write Bible? Dis thing fit affect mai wedding presents o.
I dey too absent minded when I dey in love sef. Remember dat time in 1983. I been dey make breakfast for Papa. I fry egg, do ogi plus slice bread, dey sing love songs. I come set table den tell Papa say food don readi.
Dear My Sister,
Panic not. Ah-ah. Can’t you take a joke? Just because I mentioned poison you then carry go mention to Mama. Now di woman dey mai haus. She arrive from Las Gidi yesterday. Now I no fit dey go on dates laik before. Mama say na 1 year Visa dem give am. My sister, Mama go come play with you smol o for Texas bicos mi, I no send o.Mai relationship dey sensitive stage and mi I need quality time with my love.
Na you and yua big mouth cause dis panic. Now mama say na mi muss to buy her ticket as na mi frighten di family into sending her down to look her son. Na you go pay mai sister. Na you cause panic. Anyway make we no argue.
Dem don sack mi from Sunday teacher work o. Na mai fault sha. Na Memory verse scandal some people dey call am. You see, Pastor talk make everybody learn James 1:13. You sabi am now..When tempted, no-one should say, God is tempting me for God cannot be tempted with evil…
Mai sister , when I dey type Sunday school programme on Saturday night , dey listen to Barry White, I no know the time I type Songs of Solomon 1:13. Dat one e strong well well.
..My lover is to me a sachet of myrrh resting between my breasts.
My sister, for the first time in the history of the children’s church, everyone learnt memory verse o. Even one 2 year old, im brothers teach am.
Dem summon mi before elders. My sister, I come dey laff. I hear the allegations but na mai Lepa face I dey see. Dem say na toilet I go dey clean. I come make mistake ask ‘Male or female toilet?’. Mi I ask for information but dem look mi with eye bad like say I get bad thing for mind. (No bi Idris Mohammed sing dat song…Oh Lord, Please don’t let me be misunderstood?) I know say for dia mind na ‘get thee behind me satan’ dem dey think. Dem demote mi to car park. Na there I dey 2 weeks till dem come sack mi pata pata. You see, I been dey direct traffic but I reserve space next to mai Infiniti jeep for my Lepa. Pastor wife come arrive late ask if space dey. I say no (Technically I was not lying as the only space next to my Infinity Jeep was reserved for my Lepacious darling). Na dat day Pastor wife carry plenty books come church, but I no know. She go pack 5 streets away. As she dey struggle to waka come with her plenty load and children she see me dey direct Lepa into the parking space with a smile on mai face.
My sister, as I dey type so, I no get role for church again o. Pastor say I must appear im haus for counselling. Even mama no happy with mi. I juss dey laff dem. Love don anaesthetise mai brain. All di parents for church dey look mi bad eye say I teach dia pickin wrong memory verse. Na wetin sef. Na mi write Bible? Dis thing fit affect mai wedding presents o.
I dey too absent minded when I dey in love sef. Remember dat time in 1983. I been dey make breakfast for Papa. I fry egg, do ogi plus slice bread, dey sing love songs. I come set table den tell Papa say food don readi.
WORKING ON BOOK FOLKS
Your bros Crazy in love
Babawilly
Your bros Crazy in love
Babawilly
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